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Do you choose your words before speaking?

Do you choose your words before speaking?
~ BipinMayekar©

Words have the power to create or change thoughts. These changed thoughts can change 'state of mind'.

I had read/heard the following story and have shared in our P_NLP ( Prasanna NLP) sessions in many batches.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Boy asked Mother, 'What is NLP?'

Mother replied, 'I will explain it to you. But before that you should go and ask your grandfather something.' And she whispered.

Boy went to his grandfather who was sitting in a easychair.

Boy asked, 'How is your arthritis, grandpa?
Grandfather's face faded and he murmured in sad voice,
'I can hardly move fingers today.'

Boy came back and insisted to mother that she should now explain him 'What is NLP?'

But mother had another plan. She sent him back to his Grandfather with another task.

The child asked his grandfather, 'Grandpa, do you remember my early childhood memories? 

Now, there was a smile on the face of grandfather.
He stood up from the easychair and with a laugh said,
'The funniest thing you did when you were very young was that in a christmas, you and your friend spread talcomp as snow in bathroom.
Once we were taking a walk on lovely day in a garden.
You were loudly singing nursery rhyme, you had just learned.
Man passing by gave look and asked me to let you lessen your volume. You carried on even louder.'

The old man chuckled.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When boy returned to his mother. She explained, 'This is NLP!'

The mother indirectly taught her son to change 'state of mind' of his grandfather through proper questions (using words).

The 'open' question of a grandson made grandfather thinking about pleasant memories and he also became pleasant.

ARE USING NLP?
Are you choosing your words?

Words can be used as 'command', 'statement', or 'question', with proper vocal stress.

Are you choosing your words with appropriate vocal stress for desired outcome?

Choosing own words, is also a response one has to choose and for the same, one should have control on emotions.

Reactive person mostly gets satisfying in 'settling the score' or 'blaming someone else other than himself'.

We create 'desired outcome' unknowingly in our brains. With planned efforts and known priorities, one can have 'proper outcome' with options.

But when outcome of the situation is generated naturally, then reactive person can create a fix outcome, attached with pleasurable emotions, without any options. And when such outcome is not fruitilized, then reactive person gets annoyed. He might cry under 'self_sympathy' or he might get angry under 'self_obsession'  or he might get disturbed under 'direction_less thoughts.

Then reactive person starts distributing 'blame cards', pushing responsibilities to someone else and denying own accountability.

How can a person with negative emotions, can choose his response ie his words?

To have contol on emotions, one has to take out time for 'meditation' and 'self_analysis'. Meditation will calm your emotions. Self_analysis will enlighten awareness of strengths you possess and required strengths, along with available opportunities and areas of improvement in the situations in your life.
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Proactive person has 'options' as his last step, if his 'desired outcome' is not achieved. But before that he prepares a strategy to achieve his 'desired outcome' in 'family communication' or in his 'professional communication'.

If his 'desired outcome' is not achieved, then back of mind or on paper, he is ready with the options. So without getting upset he uses another strategy to achieve the 'desired outcome'.

Such proactive person, with a cool and calm mind, can choose his 'actions' or 'words in communication'.

When the 'desired outcome' is more important than 'self_centeredness', then person becomes more flexible in his behaviour or communication.

Remember, meditation helps us to bring our concentration in present tense, which helps us to calm our emotions.

So, daily take out time for 'meditation' and 'self_analysis' for desired outcomes (with options as very last step).

~ BipinMayekar©

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